I'm in one of those moods again. It seems to work on a cycle and about 4 times a year I get in a funk. I don't think it's anything that I need meds for, but I just hate this feeling. I just want to sleep and don't feel productive at all. And now is not the time for it! I have too much to do. Yet, I muddle my way through the work day and then get home and don't get anything done. I don't even look forward to the weekend. Blah! I know I've got a lot on my mind right now and maybe if I get it out, it'll make me feel better. So, humor me.
- This job! For God's sake, when will I get a start date! The background investigation has been going on for almost 2 months. I was offered the job 4 months ago! And I have very little information about the job itself. I know my pay, the job title and the location. I don't know my hours, my days or even what exactly I'll be doing! They said they were flexible w/ the schedule, so I'm trying not to worry, but I HATE being in flux. I like to have plans and lists and dates! It's making it hard to plan the holidays too. When am I going to start? Will I be able to take time off for things we've already planned? I hate, hate, hate being up in the air!
- And because of this, I've been slacking at my current job. My heart isn't in it right now. And I think I'm trying to hate it so that it's easier to leave when I have to. But, it makes the days stretch for forever. Plus, having only 60 minutes of Internet (in 10 minute blocks that you forfeit if you have to shut down bc maybe your boss needs something) a day is driving me batty!
- I'm a stress spender and have spent too much money this month. I know I shouldn't, but I do. I'm trying so hard to get the credit cards paid off, yet I sabotage myself by spending!
- I have to plan Carissa's birthday party and am not motivated at all! We're doing an Amazing Race theme. I have lots of ideas, but need to actually put a plan together and get it all done.
- Stupid me decided to MAKE some Christmas presents this year. Which is really time consuming. And I'm depending on others to help (like my brothers to send me pictures of their kids) and they don't follow through. I'm making Grandparent posters for my mom and FIL, yet no one else has sent me their kids pictures! It's driving me crazy!
- I bought some magazines online in August for Carissa and we still haven't gotten them. And now I can't find the damn company I ordered through. The charge on my credit card is very generic. I think I might dispute the charge, but that's a whole nother thing to do.
- My dermatologist charged me $100 to have a few moles removed. I know it's wrong bc that's the inpatient surgery rate, but I don't have the energy to fight them about it.
- On the same note, the dentist (who completely mangled my mouth and now I can't eat any cold fruit or vegetables bc it KILLS me) charged us wrong too. And they don't keep electronic records (WTF?) so I'm going round and round w/ them.
- AND I'm having some lady problems. I had an ultrasound and some blood drawn and have to go back for a consult. But, I'm pretty sure the u/s tech saw something. She got really weird at one point. And I keep putting off making the consult appt.
- The kids are driving me CRAZY lately. All they do is bicker all day long. They go outside and bicker, they go in the bathroom and bicker, in the car they bicker. They're seriously driving me crazy. And I don't know how to solve it. Any tips? PLEASE?
Other than that, things are all sunshine and rainbows. My husband has actually been a huge help lately. And we seem to be on the same wavelength for right now.
I just need to get out of this funk!