Um yeah, not sure I’m going to actually have that new job. My background investigation started last week. In addition to filling out numerous questionnaires, fingerprint cards and the like, they also come out to meet with me, my co-workers, my neighbors, people I haven’t seen in 10 years and the doctor who delivered me. Ok, maybe not the last one, but they do face to face interviews will all the rest.
I had to admit that I wasn’t too concerned. I filled out the paperwork and they only asked my history going back 10 years. I thought, “go me!” , I’ve been a fine upstanding citizen for the last 10 years. Nothing to worry about!
Then he gets here. And he has another 30 page questionnaire to fill out. This one going back to EVER! Seriously, like back to birth! Unfortunately, I wasn’t a find upstanding citizen oh say, 15 years ago. I went through a wild child stage right after high school and did some crazy things. So, we had to go over all of that crap. Actually, I don’t think that stuff’s going to hurt me, but it’s memories that I don’t care to relive. It was a bad time in my life and having to talk about it isn’t fun.
Then, we had the truly odd questions:
Have you ever used prescription medication? (Thankfully, he clarified that they were looking for mainly pain meds. Unfortunately, I’ve had oral surgery twice and birth four kids, so I’m pretty sure I’ve taken meds at some point, but couldn’t remember what or when!)
Have you ever broken the law and not been caught, including speeding? (I swear, is this a trick question? Are they just wanting to see if I’m stupid enough to say no?)
Have you ever had disloyal feelings toward the U.S.? (I really wanted to say, “Only if Sarah Palin becomes president?” But, I held back.)
Then the shitty part. He asked if I have any family members with drug problems, drug arrests, etc. Unfortunately, both of my brothers have had serious drug issues. So, I had to disclose all of that. I’m really hoping that doesn’t hurt me. I’m pretty sure my one brother was arrested for intent to sell at one point. I’m not all that close to my brothers. They’re quite a bit younger than me and they went through this awful time and I completely shut myself off from them. Just recently we’ve been in contact more, but it’s only when I go to my mom’s house and for holidays. We’re really not close. But, I’ll be pissed if I don’t get this job because of them.
So, now I’m in a holding pattern once again. They have to finish talking to everyone I’ve ever looked at and then they write a report and turn it in to be reviewed. If they still want me, then they’ll give me a start date. We’re probably looking at 6-8 weeks away.
Ugh, the stress of this job is killing me!
Sorry the spacing is all messed up. Because I have limited time on the Internet, I type in Word and copy and paste, but it doesn't seem to translate well. Sorry!
They do that one on Travis every few years - they want to know the stuff for records but RARELY does anyone not get clearance based on a family member. Mostly they just want to ask you hard questions to show you can be honest about them!
Go Lori!
Posted by: Papaya Mom | October 06, 2008 at 11:57 AM
I'm sure a lot if it is to just make sure you're an honest person, and you'll pass that with flying colors. I hope it all works out!
Posted by: Noah | October 06, 2008 at 03:43 PM
I hope it works out.
I'm not really interested in reliving my wild child days with anyone either. Although I did have to disclose a misdemeanor arrest at age 18 for my teaching credential background check. Apparently the 26 years of clean living since then stood me in good stead. I'm sure it will be the same for you.
Posted by: Jenn @ Juggling Life | October 06, 2008 at 09:13 PM
Wow. That's nuts. Did they take blood, hair and fingernail samples too??
Best of luck!!!
Posted by: bubblewench | October 07, 2008 at 05:09 AM
I'm sure they know all that stuff already, and want to see if you're honest about it. A simple background check would show that stuff up. I hope it works out! xx
Posted by: Suzy | October 07, 2008 at 11:18 AM
To let you know, I have a friend in the FBI right now, and they went and talked to everyone in her past. Well, not everyone, but definitely some people, including her ex boyfriend (one of my best friends). Oddly enough, they did NOT come to me. We were freaking nuts - I mean drugs and partying like rock stars nightly. I seriously don't know how she got in the FBI! (Plus, she couldn't really keep a secret!) But she's in - and has been for years now.
You'll be fine. Seriously. If she could get in the FBI, with her wild past, anyone can!
Posted by: Sybil Law | October 07, 2008 at 12:28 PM
Blimey, they don't tend to ask stuff like that over here. Mad. I'm sure you'll be fine though hon. Hugs.
Posted by: Jo Beaufoix | October 07, 2008 at 01:14 PM
I'm sure they just ask you to fill out the questionnaire for their own entertainment on cold and boring nights.
Posted by: missburrows | October 08, 2008 at 09:57 AM
oh man...that sounds horribly stressful.
I'm crossing my saggy boobs that it will soon be over and you'll have the job.
Posted by: Corey | October 08, 2008 at 12:20 PM
everybody makes mistakes, and if that kept them out of stuff, no one would be in anything.
wow. i am SO profound. is the room swirling for you?
frig. i had such great high hopes for this comment.
i picked the wrong day to stop sniffin glue...
Posted by: hollydolly | October 14, 2008 at 03:07 PM