Parenting Advice #1

I'm no expert on parenting. I'll make that really clear. But, I have picked up some tidbits during this 13+ year trek. I figured I might share some of these little bits of sanity with you all, seeing as I've received most of them from my good friends. Most of the time, I say, "Whatever works!" Things may sound weird or totally off the wall, but some of them really do work.

Today I'll share my way to get teenagers to open up. Our problem started in the pre-teen years, about two years ago. We were getting to the point where we always got one word answers. Sometimes we'd even be shunned when trying to talk about embarrassing or controversial things. We'd hear, "Ugh, I don't want to talk about it."

Great! I always hope that I'll be that "cool" mom that my kids will feel comfortable talking to about anything. (Maybe not everything, but most things.) It crushed me to get the cold shoulder. I really wanted to be better and breakthrough to her.

So, where did I go? To my online mommy friends, of course. And one of them told me something that worked for her sister. And lo and behold, it does. And it's simple.

Just get a notebook. And leave it available at all times. And let your child know it's there and that it's always open for them to leave notes about what's bothering them or if they want to talk about something that's uncomfortable talking face to face.

I swear, it works like a charm. Pretty much every discussion we've ever had about sex has been in that notebook. But, that's fine with me, because there have been plenty. And if this is the way it needs to be done, at least it's getting done. We've had some two hour long "discussions" this way. Passing the notebook back and forth.

I think it's just a really non-threatening situation. She's in her room, I'm where ever. There's no "tone" to the writing. No raised voices. No crazy faces and rolled eyes. No judgement. We each actually take the time to think our thoughts through and then write them down.

We've had some major things happen this year. Most are chronicled in that notebook. I'm not sure if I'll save it or not. I'm sure it'd embarrass the hell out of her when she gets older.

But, for now, it works. And for that I'm thankful!

Comments

[Sarah is Ok]

I linked from bossy's link farm. What a great idea. I'm definitely going to remember this one for the future. Thanks for the tip!